Glass half empty

13. November 2014

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Glass half empty

I wasn’t brought up in a ‘glass half full’ kind of family. It was more, ‘call that a glass?’ or even, ‘glass? What glass?’. So being told to keep positive is all very well, but it goes completely against the grain.

I light, I’ve spent the past two weeks rushing about trying to get Christmas and two pre-Christmas birthdays done before I go into hospital next week. While one half of my brain is sure I’ll be fine, the operation will go well, and that will be that, the other half is equally certain I’ll die on the operating table. I am therefore planning a funeral at the same time as asking people over at Christmas. It’s not quite as surprising when you hear that close relatives have asked me about my will and what will happen to the house. I’m just as bad, I admit – I’ve already divided up my jewellery between my daughters.

But I know it’s not the ideal mindset. In that light, I’ve spent the past two weeks rushing about trying to get Christmas and two pre-Christmas birthdays done before I go into hospital next week. Keeping busy is probably as good as keeping positive, I’ve decided. I now have a great mound of stuff collected up in my secret hiding place – somewhere so well known to the whole family, even the cats, that I wouldn’t be at all surprised if there wasn’t a single surprise left, if you see what I mean. At some point, I’m going to have to get everything out and sort it into piles, one per person, and two per person for the pre-Christmas birthdays. I’m dreading this more, almost, than the whole operation thing (apart from the dying-on-the-table bit). What usually happens, when I have three or so months to assemble everything, is that I completely forget what I’ve already got and find that some people have too much (or even two of some things) while others’ piles are a bit threadbare. I’m hoping that having condensed the whole business down into a quick sprint, I won’t have had quite so much time to duplicate/prevaricate/obliterate. Fingers crossed – for that, and the rest.

pile

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6. November 2014

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Sponsored video: Barclays and Mumsnet ‘Your Bank Live’

Sponsored video: Barclays and Mumsnet ‘Your Bank Live’ If you had to give mums a list of places it’s fun to visit with toddlers, or children of any ages, then banks would feature right down bumping at the bottom of the list, along with Post Office queues and the dentist. Although it’s tempting to do […]

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4. November 2014

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Wishing well

Wishing well

Up to St Thomas Hospital today to have my pre-op assessment – where they basically check that you are healthy enough to survive surgery. Of course I am. I’m hardly ever ill, and I’m sure that, without this blip, I would have easily reached my eighties. At this point I know I’m supposed to say […]

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31. October 2014

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…and good news?

The scans were clear! Which is a huge relief. And, judging from the expressions of the doctors, a bit of a surprise. So we go on to the next stage … another operation. A bigger one, involving taking 3cm of flesh all around the original melanoma site. And taking out a lymph node and testing […]

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22. October 2014

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The Pathway

The Pathway

One minute I was slumped, bored, in the waiting room. The next I was bolt upright, shocked, with the doctor and nurse, being told I was now on a cancer pathway. There would be a multi-disciplinary team handling my care, at this hospital, and at the other hospital I was being referred to. It sounded […]

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21. October 2014

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Bad news

Bad news

As soon as the doctor called me in from the waiting room, I knew there was something wrong. She’d been quite smiley when she first examined me three weeks before. Now she was grim-faced. I’d been seeing this appointment as a routine chat, leading to my discharge with a clean bill of health. A bit […]

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15. October 2014

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It’s Review Time

It’s Review Time

Sponsored  And talking of cleaning and polishing …. another in my Beauty Bits series, this time on good ways to start the day. As October darkens and November prepares to drizzle in, I definitely need something with a bit of oomph to wake me up in the morning as I stare at the mirror in […]

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13. October 2014

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Chore Wars

Chore Wars

All last week, Radio 4 Woman’s Hour had a running (sore) topic on Chore Wars – who does what and why. I felt tempted to write about it then, but it’s taken me until now to sort out what I feel about it. Here at Remarried Towers we have a curiously 1950s arrangement. TL brings […]

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8. October 2014

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We have lift off!

We have lift off!

Ok, you know me, I really really don’t want to be a helicopter parent. I’m happy for my children to go off and do their own thing, as long as I know exactly what that is they’re safe and happy. But against my will, this morning I felt the rush of rotor blades and, before I […]

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6. October 2014

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Monday!

Monday!

So far today (and it’s not even lunchtime yet) Child Two has missed the school bus and needed driving across town; TL lost his wallet and needed picking up from the station, bringing back home, help finding his wallet and then another lift back to the station, and the water filter man, after saying he’d […]

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