Mother’s Day

March 22, 2009

How do I do it? It’s Mother’s Day, and I’m on my own. The children are with Mr X and, as the cherry on the top of the cake, it’s no speakies with True Love.

The children didn’t even say Happy Mother’s Day on the phone this morning. Well, they’re only small(ish), and the Mother’s Day impetus comes from grown-ups and let’s just say there is not a lot of impetus around these days, as I am a Bad Mother and don’t even deserve a paltry offering from Hallmark. And yes, I know the whole thing is all made up by card manufacturers (actually, there’s strong evidence that Mother’s Day is a pagan fertility festival that’s survived two thousand years and the death of matriarchy, but I’m going to pretend I don’t know that) but it still stings to be left out.

The TL aspect is more of a mystery. How is it that we can be relied upon to row during every major holiday? Christmas, New Year, Easter, Pancake Day, National No-Smoking Day, you name it, we’ve rowed. Mind you, catch us any given Wednesday and we’ll be arguing, too. I suppose it’s probably me, being much more aware of the family life I’ve given up, getting even more tense than usual during these bank holidays and being unable to let the slightest thing pass. Or maybe it’s him, just being TL, bless him.

All I know is that it sucks, but thank God for friends. This morning, I went to the Royal Festival Hall with a chum to listen to a Bach cello concert. It was beautiful, and the blue, cloudless skies over the London Eye as we walked along the South Bank were as perfect as the heavens in the opening sequence of the Simpsons. Seeing the Eye reminded me of a Mum Chum who’d said it could be used as a wedding venue. Of course, my mind leapt, ridiculously and romantically, to scenes of me and my TL pledging our lives to each other in one of the airborne pods. As well as the gorgeous view, this would have the advantage, I was thinking, of meaning he couldn’t possibly avoid me for once. And then I realised. He’d always find an escape hatch somewhere, even if it meant breaking the glass with his teeth and climbing down a rope made of his own shoelaces.

Ah well, I did get one Mother’s Day offering, and it was presented with special love. As I sat down at my desk just now to whinge, sorry, post, I discovered the mangled corpse of half a mouse placed just where my feet usually rest. Outside, sitting in the garden with a bashful smile on her whiskers and a self-satisfied twitch in her pussycat tail, was Mme Bovary, quite clearly waiting to be thanked. Darling, you really, really shouldn’t have.

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  • Jennysmith March 22, 2009 at 1:35 pm

    Poor DD. The girls should be with you today surely. Or a nudge from their dad perhaps.

    But remember M’ Day is only a gesture, it doesn’t really mean anything except a lucrative time for Hallmark and Clintons. Your children love you all year round (and the cat) xxx

  • Not Waving but Drowning March 23, 2009 at 2:44 am

    It was indeed a love token!

    Ex sounds a ratbag and TL a coward.

    Get yourself a facepack, some fab bath stuff and a whopping bar of chocolate and then indulge and spoil yourself something rotten.


  • rosiescribble March 23, 2009 at 6:13 am

    That’s a tough one. A reminder that Mother’s Day isn’t that great for everyone. I’m sure the kids were thinking of you though.

  • rosiero March 23, 2009 at 9:09 am

    It’s all commercialised and another bad habit we’ve got from the US of A. I am sure the kids adore you all year round. As for TL and the X-factor, they want their heads banging together!

  • Chairman Bill March 25, 2009 at 2:28 am

    Ah – but do you putt the stops out on Father’s Day? My ex goes out of her way to ensure the boys don’t send me anything on birthdays or Father’s Day.

    Obviously some people can’t move on.

  • Chairman Bill March 25, 2009 at 2:29 am

    That was meant to read pull, not putt.


  • splodge March 25, 2009 at 11:07 am

    Poor you! You should’ve dropped huge hints to the children like I did. Mind you, my teenager got me a card but left it at his friend’s house.

    Hope you don’t mind me saying that your relationship with TL doesn’t sound exactly ideal.

  • Yummy Mammy March 25, 2009 at 5:06 pm

    I know exactly how you feel. I too got absolutely nothing on Mothers Day, and told that my darling little baby had to give the X’s girlfriend (!!!) a card and present instead of me. It’s ok, I didn’t go round there and kill her – only just!

  • DulwichDivorcee March 27, 2009 at 8:42 am

    Thank you Jennysmith. Not entirely sure about the children but the cat does adore me xx

  • DulwichDivorcee March 27, 2009 at 8:44 am

    You’re right, Rosiescribble, not a great time for a lot of people. These big occasions cause a lot of stress. Where’s that Chardonnay?

  • DulwichDivorcee March 27, 2009 at 8:45 am

    Rosiero, I agree about Mr X and TL. Sometimes they seem to be competing for the Most Annoying Man prize!

  • DulwichDivorcee March 27, 2009 at 8:46 am

    Hi Chairman Bill, actually I’m pretty good about Father’s day – the treasures make cards and I usually drum up a tie or keyring or something ….your X should meet Mr X, sure they’d have fun!

  • DulwichDivorcee March 27, 2009 at 8:47 am

    Yummy Mammy, just give me her address and I’ll sort it out ….

  • Maternal Tales March 31, 2009 at 7:27 am

    Mother’s Day, Smother’s Day. Husband was away and didn’t even know it was happening and nursery forgot to give me the card that Edie had made. Sadly, not even the cat brought me anything. Now I hate to be one to drop hints, but I think I may have to if I want next year to be any better!

  • Mel April 2, 2009 at 4:44 pm

    Poor you, I was also alone as my husband was at work and the kids are too young to do much on their own. As lovely as Mother’s Day is love is an all year round thing, I bet your kids think you’re the best all the time.

  • Suburbia April 15, 2009 at 2:46 pm

    My cat used to leave his catch under the TV. I guess he worked out that was the focal point of life! When I have got rid of my cat hating husband, I hope to get another wise cat 🙂

    (sorry your M day wasn’t up to ‘scratch’, mine was similar – minus the greatful cat)